Insight and inspiration for flying higher in the difference only you can make from guests who have appeared on Creative on Purpose Live.
This week’s wisdom comes from a conversation with Drasko Raicevic, founder of Peacefully Ambitious CEO. Tune into the entire conversation here.
[DRASKO] You mentioned self-sabotage before, and the way that I define self-sabotage, because it happens to all of us, right? So, to me, self-sabotage is very real but doesn't actually exist. And when people hear that, they're like, "Okay, well, how does that actually make any sense?"
So the reason that it makes sense is, like, self- sabotage is very real but doesn't exist. So, the real part of it is the consequences of it. So, self-sabotage will inherently have a lot of negative consequences to it. The reason it doesn't exist is because, fundamentally, when you look deep enough, all of our behaviors are need-fulfilling.
So, while on the surface you are self-sabotaging, and that is what the behavior looks like, in a very logical sense, emotionally, the emotional logic behind it makes a lot of sense. When you can see it in its full regard... So, if there is somebody who's out there who's like, "Man, why do I keep self-sabotaging? Why can't I get over this thing?" just know that subconsciously there is a very good reason why you are doing what you are doing.
So, if you procrastinate there's some level of safety in that procrastination. There's some level of significance in that procrastination. Like, there is some benefit with regards to why you do that. You might not want to accept it. You might not see it. But fundamentally, that is why you procrastinate.
And it's the same thing for like, "Why do I overwork well because sometimes it's easier to overwork and drain yourself of energy because you won't have any more energy to like feel all of the things, right?
"Why do I not say anything whenever I have an underperforming employee?" Well, because fundamentally, deep down inside, you know, if you had a tumultuous history with people yelling at you, you're thinking, "Okay, well, they're going to blow up at me, and then that's going to mean something about me."
So, even on the surface, all of these are self-sabotaging things that we all struggle with every single day when you can just pause and look, "Okay, what might be the benefit of this? What might be the good reason emotionally why I might be doing this.
Usually, it's going to be rooted in some type of safety or security. Not always something's going to be significant too, but generally, you will, when you look deep enough, find that "Yeah, it absolutely makes sense why I'm doing this behavior. If I can eliminate that reason, then the self-sabotage itself just stops. You don't need any discipline for it.
Drasko just delivered an important insight about how to beat your inner-saboteur. How might inverting the Golden Rule help you find the root cause of your self sabotaging?
Don’t miss out. Join the community and the conversation with a free 7-day trial.
Go Further
Click here to access Creative on Purpose’s most-read and highest-impact content.
If you're stuck and want my help, consider Catalyst. We’ll clarify the real challenge, create a plan to solve it and reduce the time it would’ve taken to try to solve it on your own.