My meditation app shares a daily quote and yesterday’s was by Mandy Hale, author of The Single Woman.
“Change is painful. But not as painful as staying stuck somewhere you don’t belong.”
It’s a powerful quote, and I agree in principle. But I find this quote by family psychotherapist, Virginia Satir, rings truer in practice.
“Most people prefer the certainty of misery to the misery of uncertainty.”
Think about it. Have you ever stuck with an unfulfilling job or a dysfunctional relationship? Lived somewhere you didn’t like? Held onto habits that didn’t serve your health or happiness? Avoided medical tests or treatments?
I’ve caught myself doing all the above more than once. What about you?
Why is that?
Most of us justify, rationalize, or just plain settle for uncomfortable or negative situations because the familiarity of those circumstances feels safer than venturing into the unknown, despite the potential for better outcomes.
Put another way, we cling to known discomfort rather than risk the unknown, possibly because the known—even if miserable—provides a twisted sense of security through predictability.
Fear of uncertainty can be a powerful force that holds you back from making meaningful change for the better in your life.
What to do?
Here’s my take, based on my personal experience, and the experience shared by thousands of clients, students, and readers. The decision to stop settling for misery and instead step into possibility only happens when you’re ready to answer the following question in the affirmative.
“Have you suffered enough?”
You quit the crap job or relationship when you decide you suffered enough. You move to a new home, start building healthier habits, or see the doctor when you’ve suffered enough.
And what is “enough” when it comes to suffering?
It depends.
We all have different tolerances and temperaments when it comes to suffering. Your rock bottom is different from my rock bottom.
But here’s the thing. Everyone’s rock bottom is a matter of choice.
Sure, one hangover can cure one person of alcohol addiction while another has to lose their marriage, kids, house, and career before they quit. But in the end, an end to suffering is a choice.1
So, here’s an invitation. Where in your life or business are you choosing suffering?
Seriously, think about it. Recognize it. Acknowledge your choice to suffer.
Now, answer this question, “Have you suffered enough?”
An Invitation to All Subscriber
Have you suffered enough? Are ready to embrace and step into a better possibility with your life or business?
If so, join Creative on Purpose’s next 30-day sprint.
Here’s how you can participate.
I opened up three additional seats in Catalyst. This 4-week program provides weekly 1:1 coaching and direct access to me between sessions.2
A group coaching call will be scheduled every week this month for additional support and to tap the wisdom of multiple perspectives.
This month’s free subscriber workshop provides resources to help you clarify your priorities and success path. An extended Q&A and implementation session will follow for members of the premium subscriber community.
Free subscribers can access the free workshop. Premium subscribers can attend the exclusive Q&A and implementation session after this month’s free workshop and sit in on the weekly group coaching calls. Clients can participate in the weekly group coaching calls to catalyze the progress they’re making with the 1:1 sessions.
Most readers won’t participate in any of the above, and that’s okay. Now may not be the time for you for this kind of sprint.
However, if now is the time to get real about clarifying and achieving your aspirations, join us at whatever level works for you.
REPLY or email me if you have any questions or want to learn more about any of the options for working together to get closer to what you want this month.
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